I gave CL a few days to think things through and come up with a plan to pay back what he owes. I did give him credit for the $1,000 that AJ gave him, even though it still does not make sense to me to take money out of the household just to turn around and put it back in.
I walked him through all of the numbers so everything was clear. His response was that he is not going to pay back the additional money I loaned him for the repairs on the car. That is not something I agree with, but at least now I know where he stands.
Since his stipend is deposited into AJ’s account, I am going to make sure that she sends me what he owes first and then gives him whatever remains. That was the original agreement, and it needs to be followed. I am also going to push for double payments until he is caught up.
At the end of our conversation, I made it clear to him that it does not make sense for me to take money out of my household to cover his responsibilities, especially when he refuses to get a job and support his own family.
On the other hand, AE has been changing. Since the conversation where I explained that AJ and I were at the point of discussing divorce, he seems to understand what is at stake. His attitude has shifted, and things around the house have been better. Everyone is getting along more, which has made a noticeable difference.
AJ seems different as well. I think she is trying right now. She has been making an effort to contribute financially to the household, which I do appreciate. I also think she understands that I have reached a point where my tolerance for everything that has been going on is gone, and I am no longer willing to accept it.
Since I told her that I would not be updating her on conversations with CL unless she specifically asks, there has been very little discussion about it between us. We did talk briefly about CL claiming that I am trying to screw him over with the car. I told her that if I really wanted to go that route, I could create a much bigger problem for him by involving law enforcement over issues like the car not being insured, along with other things that could potentially impact his standing with school or his probation.
That is not what I am trying to do. I just want him to take responsibility and follow through on what he agreed to.
Drifted Notes 